Personal Development Tips Guides DOT com

When it comes to meeting women, you do not have minutes to impress her. In truth you only have a few precious seconds, no it is not a lot of time by any means but a few seconds is really all it takes to get a first impression of someone and many times the first impression will determine if you get a second chance with her. If you are wondering how to get a girlfriend, the answer is by using that little window of opportunity given too you in the first few seconds.

Start with the background

In a few seconds a woman will scan you over and in her mind stamp you as a yes, no way or maybe, your goal is not just to avoid being a no but also to avoid being a maybe. If you hit on a beautiful woman in a bar and her interest seems lukewarm that means you are in her maybe pile, leaving plenty of opportunities throughout the night for a guy that makes a better first impression to end up being the one that goes home with her.

To avoid this you should make sure your appearance is not working against you and this is what forms the basis of how to get a girlfriend. Groomed hair, a sense of style and a cocky attitude go a long way towards passing the test of the first impression. Just as important is not to overdue it, some women like a preppy look but changing your laid back casual style to conform won’t score you any more points. Guys with spiky hair and peircings turn plenty of women on, as do guys who like to wear a suit. If you look like you are comfortable in what you have on it was probably the best choice.

Find a woman

This is the one that friends of mine think they have already figured out then after my explanation that look at each other with shock wondering how they could have missed something so obvious. Women are not going to fall from the sky, if you do not go out you will not meet them. Clubs do offer a chance to meet many women but they are best for a weekend night. During the weekdays, many other places are more active and should be considered if you want to learn how to get a girlfriend. Social clubs, community centers, parks, malls, museums, theaters and gyms are great ways of meeting women.

Men often meet women in locations that they did not even think about and tend to let a perfect potential girlfriend slip through their hands because they did not pay attention. If a woman is in a hardware store or buying sporting equipment at the same time as you offer to give her a hand. If you meet a woman during class offer to share your notes with her. If you meet a woman while attending a conference for your job invite her back to your room for drinks and more conversation. Do not let the perfect girl slip away because you think the timing is wrong, chances are you will never see her again.

Make the right eye contact

Ever felt a cold chill on your neck from an unpleasant stare? Well that is similar to what women feel if you make the wrong type of eye contact. If you want to know how to get a girlfriend, your eye contact has too be right! Don’t keep your gaze focused on a woman for 5 or 10 minutes before you walk over. You look in her direction and attempt to get your eyes to lock. If she does not look your way it might be because she is engrossed in conversation, the room is too dark or you are sitting too far away.

Do something to get her attention, send over a drink to the table or walk closer to her general area. Not close enough that she feels like she is being stalked but that when she looks up you will be directly in her line of sight and she will have no choice but too make eye contact with you.

Pay attention to what her eyes say when they finally meet, if the gaze is warm you should probably approach. Flirting is really what seals the deal if you want to know how to get a girlfriend. When you walk over do something a little unexpected take her hand and give her a kiss, say a romantic pick up line or do something to make her laugh.

Tips and Guides: Buddy Franklin is a dating advice guru. He recommends: How to Get Girls, Getting Girls, Tips on How to Get a Girlfriend

In Anthony De Mello’s book ‘The Way To Love’ he talks alot about our attachment to people and things. In particular he mentions our need to be loved by another as if we would die if they did not exist.

When we give up who we are to please another person we do what I call prostitute our being. We are no longer ourselves but instead begin to conform to what they want/expect of us. Even when we think we know what it is another person wants there are no guarantees that we will get it right so we live in constant fear of making a mistake.

That is no way to live and it is certainly no way to love. I am certainly no expert on love but the one thing I have learnt from studying Mr De Mello is the fact that our attachments are the root cause of our unhappiness and at any moment we can detachment from them all and enjoy true and long lasting happiness.

Detachment doesn’t mean you give a person or thing up. You don’t have to detach from your car by selling it and giving it up because that just produces the pain of not having and even more unhappiness. But it is about recognizing that without the car you can remain happy. Without the big house you are still a unique and wonderful human being.

Detaching who you are from what you own is an important part of personal growth. Your greatest error will be to believe that who you are is based upon what you own and what you have because if you ever have to give them up then you will lose confidence in yourself and who you are. If you earn 30,000 a month and drive a sports car then suddenly you lose your job, after a few months can’t keep up mortgage payments on your exclusive town house and lose that, the car goes next and you are left unemployed without the trappings does that make you any less important than you were when you had them? The answer of course is no it does not.

It is an unstable state of illusion if you place all your confidence into the status that you believe a car or house will give you because it’s all relative to the situation. What does that mean????

Well imagine you live in a neighborhood where everyone drives cars worth $7,000 and you buy yourself a wonderful BMW and your car is worth $24,000. Instantly you can begin believing that your status is above everyone and they believe that too. They automatically believe you must have more money than they do even if the real fact is that you bought the car on HP!

You drive around in your neighborhood and everyone looks at your car with envy. The guys all want to talk to you because they want the opportunity to get into and be seen in your car. You are the top of the pack!

Today you decide to visit a friend. You drive to your friends house and in her neighborhood everyone drives a car to the value of $45,000 and over. Jags, convertible audis, porches, mercedes, they don’t even look at you as you drive up because you’re considered a ‘poor cousin’ when compared to what they drive.

Now suddenly in this neighbourhood your status means nothing… where just 10 minutes before in your own neighbourhood you felt like the top of the pack you are suddenly reduced to nothing worth looking at when you visit your friend.

This is why placing your status in ‘things’ is so shallow and a complete waste of time…. because there will be times when it will make you feel great and other times when it won’t! It will never help fill the void for what you are truly looking for. It provides temporary relief from feeling like nothing but at any moment if you lost your precious thing you will drop right back down again. Plus you have to work hard to keep it, maintain it and replace it with something better. You will worry about people stealing, breaking and ruining it and this worry will cause ill health.

How much easier is it to focus on building our inner strength. In knowing that when we spend time on our own personal growth we can get to a place of inner strength that will not be shaken in any circumstance or with any person. We are connected with a Source of power that guides us and supports us in our goal to manifest our intentions. This ever increasing, always available, uplifting and empowering energy within you is your own greatness and when you learn to tap into it nothing and no one can stop you from feeling amazing 100% of the time. At different times of our lives we will jump in and out of this ocean depending on our needs but we will always know that at any moment we can return and recharge because it will always be there with unconditional love waiting for us.

Now isn’t that so much better than plain ole stuff!!!

Tips and Guides: Register to receive our free eCourse “Discovering Greatness Experiencing Joy” as well as other free personal development information and audios at http://www.inspirationalguidance.com

There are secrets to dating guys and not everyone feels like sharing. Luckily for you I do. Unless you are born being the alpha male every single guy needs a little assistance to learn how to attract women.

The first step in improving your dating history is to find and establish your personality type. Answer these simple questions to determine if you are a beta, omega or alpha male.

1. When you go out with your friends:

a. You are the leader in charge. Telling everyone what to do and staying the center of attention of every girl in the room.

b. You are the guy who hangs out in the background while your alpha friend hits on beautiful women and gets all the phone number.

c. You are the guy your friends feel sorry for, and make fun of. You defer to their leadership and do what they tell you.

2. When you ask out a women:

a. You walk right up to her. You are the alpha male, confident and secure in your own skin, knowing that you have something to offer.

b. You spend a few minutes working up your nerve before you approach. You are a little nervous and don’t show much confidence but you are able to ask for her number and make small talk.

c. You turn red and stumble all over yourself when you finally get up the courage to walk up to a women. You stare and stammer and have trouble getting out a full sentence, she may even walk away before you finish speaking.

3. When speaking to a woman over the phone you:

a. You are charming and funny, easily able to keep the conversation flowing and keeping her interested. When you hang up the phone, she is left waiting wishing the conversation didn’t end so soon.

b. You are able to get her attention but have trouble keeping it. You don’t know what to talk about and there are some long silences in conversation while you struggle to think of something to say.

c. You are too distracted and nervous to say much of anything. She does most of the talking with you throwing in a word every now and then.

4. When out on a first date with a woman:

a. You make jokes and small talk getting her to laugh and relax in your presence.

b. You struggle to keep the conversation going and have trouble thinking of interesting topics, often letting an uncomfortable silence build.

c. You sweat, stammer and stare, struggling to control your nerves and hormones, your date is bored and ready to end the evening early.

5. When it comes to sex with beautiful women:

a. You get more sex than you can handle, able to get a woman to say “yes” with no effort on your part.

b. You are hit or miss. You get some sex but not with the hottest women around and nowhere near as often as you want.

c. You can barely remember the last time you had sex and have trouble getting women interested in anything beyond first dates and casual kisses.

Mostly a answers: You are the alpha male. You possess the strong dominant personality that women find irresistible. You know how to be charming without being overly sensitive or feminine in your behaviors. You are able to get phone numbers from most any women you want and progress past first dates to kissing and sex. You know how to handle yourself in any social situation with a woman, even knowing how to handle several women at once!

Mostly b answers: You are the beta. In the behavior hierarchy, you are second to the alpha male. You know how to socialize with women but it is not natural and you quickly cave under the pressure. Though you are able to attract some women and carry on conversations, you do not know how to keep a woman’s interest and when the alpha male is in the room, you get no love.

Mostly c answers: You are the omega male. You find yourself feeling awkward and out in place in most social situations. You have trouble speaking to women and standing up for yourself in all social situations. When you do approach a women you don’t just get rejected you often end up embarrassed with an audience to catch the humiliation. Your male friends have no respect for you and your female friends treat you like one of the girls.

If you are a beta or omega male there is hope for you. You can learn how to develop your alpha male behaviors to stop getting rejected by women. You can retrain how you interact with women to get more dating success than you ever thought possible.

Tips and Guides: Buddy Franklin is a dating advice guru. He recommends: How to Become an Alpha Male, Alpha Male, Alpha Male Behavior

Single mothers, are you stressed out and overwhelmed, yet somehow telling yourself that you are fine until the last straw breaks and you snapped - and you wonder what happened?

Are your muscles tensed, and your head throbbing? Are you experiencing rapid breathing and feeling fatigue? Are you feeling uptight and sometimes (more often than you would have liked) lose your temper? Are you experiencing difficulty concentrating on your work and maybe even finding it harder to enjoy sound sleep?

How would you like to be calm and cantered yet confident and energized, standing in your power and functioning at your best capacity with laser sharp clarity and focus mind? You enjoy better relationships with your children and able to spend more time relaxing and bonding with them. Imagine yourself performing at your peak at home and at work, productive, swift and enjoying your work, having a strong sense of purpose and living in fulfillment?

Tip 1 - Your Breath. Your breath is the essence of your life. Have you noticed how you have been breathing? You breath reflects your stress level and you can use your breath to control your stress. Slow relax breath gives slow, relax lives. Take Control of you breath.

Tip 2 - Your Stress Starts in the Mind. It is how you perceive yourself and the situation around you and your respond to that perception that stresses you. The same event can be stressful to one but not another. Take control of your mind.

Tip 3 - Your Body Is Closely Related to Your Mind - Your body is closely connected to your brain, your mind. When the body is tight and tense, so is your mindset, you become rigid, fixed, unable to adapt and insist on your own views. Shake the tension off your body.

Tip 4 - Your Vision and Your Focus - When you know what you want, when your goals are defined, you have crystal clear focus and direction. You know where you are going and your next step is clear. Stress takes over only if you do not have focus and are tying to accomplish too much by multi-tasking and taking on the whole weight upon your shoulder. Guard your vision and your focus.

Tip 5 - Your Purpose / Mission - Know why you are doing what you are doing. When your activities are aligned with your values, the activities will not seem burdensome. Instead you have a mission and you find joy and fulfilment in doing the same ‘chores’ that you have been doing. Live in alignment with your purpose and mission.

Tip 6 - Your Perspectives / Outlook - Life can be heavy and monotonous while we grind through what needs to be done or it can be meaningful and fun filled. You decide how stressful you want your life to be. Choose the perspectives you want.

Tip 7 - Your Environment - Who do you have surrounding you? What words do you hear around you? What behaviors do you see around you? Single mothers, surround yourselves with friends, family, community that nurtures and supports you in your quest to be true to yourself and live the life you want.

Tips and Guides: Louisa Chan is a Certified Professional Coach, your partner for success. Claim your free mini e-course and audio on stress-free living tips here. If you want help applying these tips in your unique case, contact Coach Louisa for a complimentary strategy session.

Shyness does not get the recognition it deserves. Men who suffer from shyness meeting people find that their entire lives are negatively affected by their inability to function in social situations. Overcoming shyness for most men can be a long and painful experience, some guys go so far as to spend thousands of dollars on expensive therapy sessions and become so isolated they loose all contact with the outside world. There is no need to let shyness become your entire live and in most cases you do not have to spend thousands of dollars and months in therapy to learn how to connect with others, there are popular methods that other guys have used to overcome shyness meeting people.

Look for friends wherever you go

Shy guys tend to have a limited social circle. If you are a shy guy who is lucky enough to still be friends with a group of people you have know for years, that’s great. However, you should still take care not to isolate yourself to only these friends. You can only overcome shyness be being able and willing to meet and connect with people you do not yet know well enough to be comfortable around.

There are many great places you go everyday that can be used to help you make new friends and overcome shyness meeting people. The park, library, stores, coffee houses, your job and restaurants are a few examples. Anywhere there are other people to mingle with! There is almost no wrong place to make friends, guys. Because these are places you frequent there is nothing you have to think about to say, you can strike a conversation by commenting on how good the coffee taste, just saying hello or asking for a little assistance with finding an item you want to buy.

Even if these casual meetings do not end up getting you sex with the girl of your dreams they allow you to start talking and interacting with others around you without feeling pressure. Once you are able to naturally strike up a conversation with a stranger you have gained increased self-esteem and should start trying to date women.

Start with places that interest you

Men often neglect one of the best places to meet women. Clubs and bars serve their purpose but they are loud, sweaty and hot, not allowing guys who have shyness meeting people to appear in the best light. Think about what you enjoy doing in your free time, there are plenty of women who are likely to be involved in this activity as well. Join a cooking, dance or pottery class to explore an interest and meet beautiful women in a natural setting where you will be able to work with them and build up your confidence while interacting with them over a period of several weeks or months. Museums, local fairs and events, tourist spots, bowling alleys, sporting events, theaters, concerts even conventions offer you a chance to hook up with women who like the same things you do.

Once you locate women that are attractive to you don’t feel that you have to rush into asking her out. To overcome shyness meeting people take advantage of the fact you didn’t meet at a club or party where the competition is much fiercer. Forcing you to have too ask out a woman the minute you see her if you want to avoid other guys getting their first. At other locations allow the attraction too develop for a little while before making a move. Make sure to spend a few minutes making eye contact while talking to a woman each time you see her, be charming and get her to laugh. Then don’t say anything else to her for the evening unless she initiates the conversation. By holding back a little, you can have a girl that much more interested in dating you. By the time you do ask her out the attraction is already full blown, quickly leading to making out and having sex.

If you truly want to overcome shyness meeting people, you have to be able to face rejection. No one wants to be dumped, be laughed at or made to feel like less than a man. However, their are no positives about allowing yourself to become isolated from everyone else around you. If you have ever heard the saying “no pain no gain”, you understand that if you want to gain the pleasure of dating and having sex you have to be willing to put up with a little pain from being rejected.

Tips and Guides: Buddy Franklin is a dating advice guru. He recommends: Fear of Girls, Shyness Meeting People, How to Overcome Shyness

Dating is a game and just like basketball, football, baseball, hockey or soccer there are teams. In this case, the teams are men versus women. Not only are their teams in dating there are: guards, points to be made and other players in your way to winning. Some of these players are much more popular and successful than you. If you want to get laid, you need to have the handbook to the dating game and you have to study it. Learning what rules there are and how to use them to your advantage.

Know Your Competition. How does a basketball team win a game? Of course, you have to have talent but the best defense is always a good offense. If you want to get laid and date gorgeous women learn a little from all the other guys that are your biggest threats to getting a woman’s name and number. When you go out to places where girls are at, take a few minutes to look around and see what girls are approached.

Pay attention to the methods that guys use, some guys are likely to just walk right up and ask for a woman’s phone number and you might see her get angry or brush him off not too politely. You might be feeling a little sorry for the guy but truthfully, he barged right in without thinking. You do not approach a woman without making eye contact first; it is like trying to catch a fish without baiting a hook. Without the eye signal the guy had no reason to think hitting on a strange woman would get him laid.

Of course, some guys are much better players at the game, and these are the ones you want to focus on. When it comes to dating there are only so many rules and tricks that work and if what works is a method another guy uses be smart and add it to your own routine.

Believe in your talent: Ever went too high school with an incredibly gifted athlete? A guy that seemed to have so much more talent than his peers and always lead his team to victory? I did. His name was John, a guy who joined the varsity basketball team in the 10th grade and actually had the opportunity to be seen by scouts in his senior year. John might have made it all the way except the pressure proved too much for him. He started to panic and started skipping practicing; when the scouts finally came around too see him, all they saw was an average player.

John missed out on the chance of a lifetime because he would not develop his talent. Dating is a similar field and if you want to get laid, you have to be constantly approaching woman and learning what techniques work. Even guys who are called nerds or geeks and feel lost when trying to date can develop these skills. Not everyone naturally knows how to flirt or use body language to hit on woman, but there are methods of learning these skills, that will work and don’t take years to master.

Get a coach. All teams have coaches or mentors, someone to help you develop dating skills and to provide honest feedback and support when you need it. You can get this advice from your friends, but sometimes the best person to ask for advice is a guy who has been in your situation, someone who struggled to understand the rules of dating and had no idea how to walk up to a woman or ask for her phone number.

A coach does not always have to be a person. Online systems that allow men to receive information about improving their dating lives and finding women to get laid now offer a complete ’start to finish’ approach for man who need guidance. If you do not think you need guidance, take a second to think about the last ten times you approached a woman. Consider if you got her number, if the number was real and not a fake and if you were able to follow up a phone call with an actual date. Unless you scored a perfect 10 out of 10 you could use some help in the dating game.

So my advice is simple guys, if you want to get laid you have to learn the rules of dating. Dating can be fun and freeing or it can be serious and tedious. Make dating fun and have as much sex as you dream about by getting a little assistance.

Tips and Guides: Buddy Franklin is a dating advice guru. He recommends: Get Laid, Get Laid Now, Want to Get Laid

Pick up artists are men who make their livings by dating women. Some famous pick up artist have been able to date and have sex with thousands of women. Not just any women though, gorgeous women who are models, doctors, and lawyers, women of every race and nationality.

How do these pick up artist get women to sleep with them? Some use lies and manipulation, using and taking advantage of women in order to achieve their own ends. It really makes you wonder why a perfectly nice guy like you struggles so hard to attract the opposite sex. It really can be frustrating! Watching as your friends hook up with beautiful women, friends you know lie and cheat to get girls. Yet you the all around good guy with a steady job and decent looks keeps striking dirt.

The problem is not that you are not dateable but you really are not giving yourself the best representation. Dating is like a court appearance, when you head into court you know that there is an expected way for you to speak, to dress and behave. Most men however, did not get the memo that dating has these exact same rules! Pick up artist however, don’t just know the basic rules they know every trick, and tip that most guys never even dream about. If you want to start getting girls consider this valuable advice.

You are what you wear

Unlike a court appearance, dating does not have one specific dress code. The outfit you would wear to take a date out to a trendy restaurant is probably a lot different from your typical club wear. To be successful at dating you need to be able to wear clothing that looks good and fits with the situation you find yourself in. In fact, you should be able to rise above your clothing, that may sound a little strange so let me explain.

Have you ever had a friend who always wears the same type of shirt and pants but never buys new clothes or bothers to change his look? I did, Mike always wore a black t-shirt and jeans, when a friend of ours got married and he had to put on a suit, Mike was almost unrecognizable. The suit just seemed to dwarf him; since Mike was taken out of his comfort zone, he panicked and had no idea how to handle himself. He spent the entire night sulking in a corner instead of mingling with lots of available women.

The point I am trying to make is that pick up artists are never outside of their element. Any different situation or event that occurs is just another test, another way for them to see how many women they can hit on, how many phone numbers they can get and see who they can get into their beds.
Smooth moves never fail

Pick up artists are renowned for their ability to ease up to any woman, get her relaxed and carry on a conversation. They are so successful at it because they have no fear of being rejected. It is not that pick up artist cannot be rejected but they refuse to allow the idea of rejection to hold them back. Being turned down just means an excuse to hit on another girl in the room. Though it may sound a little cold, it is actually a great way of putting dating into perspective. A woman’s rejection is not going too kill you, so learn to deal with the rejections and keep on moving until you find the girl that is right for you.

Withholding is part of the fun

Pick up artists thrive on being mysterious and secretive, never telling a woman everything about themselves. Part of the desire in a new relationship is the unknown. Women find it arousing and fun to fantasize about a guy before they know everything about them. By withholding a little you keep the newness of the relationship, the period where two people in a couple are still getting too know each other, thereby keeping the relationship from going stale.

Confidence can never go wrong

Confidence plays a part in many areas of dating. Confidence is what gives guys the courage to walk up to a beautiful woman and ask her out. Confidence is what makes a guy pick up the phone to call a woman after getting her phone number and even what he relies on when taking a woman out on that crucial first date.

Confidence may seem natural to pick up artists but regular guys can easily increase their own confidence. Understand that you do deserve to date and be seen with beautiful women and that you do have something special and unique to offer women you find attractive.

Tips and Guides: Buddy Franklin is a dating advice guru. He recommends: Pick Up Artist, Pick Up Artists, Seduction Community

The main phrase for “subliminal” relates to everything that exists just below your conscience or at the level of subconscious. It’s been well-known for a long time now that in order to create measurable change that you can actually sustain, you will need to use the subliminal area or part of your spiritual subconscious. One excellent tool to do this with is by use of subliminal programming.

By utilizing the words or videos that are subliminal (online or offline) you can then skip the spiritual subconscious and start reprogramming your mind almost immediately by use of the subliminal messages chosen. These subliminal messages and content can be used for many things like reducing stress, inducing relaxation, creating motivation, smoking cessation or weight loss to name a few! So how do these messages work exactly? It’s all pretty simply but sounds a little complicated written out like this but let’s give it a go just so you can try to get a clearer understanding for what this can do for you, what it does do for you and how it can work out for you in the end! Subliminal programs contain positive assertions.

Maybe you have heard the word assertion if your into positive thinking, the law of attraction or the secret. Its pretty much the same thing. But with positive thinking YOU have to do the thinking and a lot of people that aren’t motivated or are depressed or just think this is mumbo jumbo simply cannot bring themselves to DO positive thinking. So here is an alternative for you that works the same except you are making someone or something do all the hard work. These messages are specifically designed in the area they have been produced for. So if you have a weight loss one, it will help you lose weight and have set goals TO lose weight.

The physical brain receives these assertions at a subconscious level and because there is no interference from the critical conscious mind the subconscious mind; where the beliefs and attitudes are stored, the message that is running through your brain begins to work immediately which in turn makes the subliminal messages a reality in your life!

Furthermore the messages interjected into your brain will then speed up the process of changing your attitude simply because they will pass by the critical conscious. We all have one! With positive thinking it’s about changing the way you think and with subliminal it’s more of a bypass rather than a change but after awhile the bypass won’t even be needed and instead your thoughts and attitude will have been “fixed” or switched over.

I don’t really know of any one person that has needed the same subliminal program for the rest of their life, however, the importance of them later on in life (or lack thereof) makes up for the importance of them now. These truly are something you should check into. It’s very simple. If i’ts a video you merely watch the video. If it’s a recording of some sort, you simply put on some headphones and listen to it. This isn’t brain surgery.

One of the important things you must do is realize you might really need help. And I know it’s hard to admit you need help but the good thing about sites online that have these subliminal products is that only you are going to know that you just bought! So even if you are ridiculously “proud” and don’t want to ask for help, there are alternatives! Sites that offer the packages will usually have videos you can download right on to your computer, this is convenient for you because then you can watch them whenever you want! They are cost efficient especially versus therapy! And they are really easy. What more could you ask for?!?

Tips and Guides: This author is a HUGE fan of Subliminal Video

Making a bold, life-changing resolution always sounds good on January 1, but is often hard to keep as the year goes on. Goals made just a few days ago, on New Year’s Eve, may already feel a little daunting. Sprinkling those promises made to oneself with a little moderation may help bring them down to a manageable size.

Saying “I’m going to lose weight” or “I’m going to get out of debt” are admirable goals. But these big goals may end up being too vague to be achievable. Making slight moderation to one’s existing lifestyle can bring about bigger changes in the long run.

Take the goal of losing weight for example. The two important components of losing weight are eating right and exercising. An individual is much more likely to lose weight if they focus on diet and exercise, rather than the actual weight loss. Saying, “I want to be healthier by exercising three days a week” is an achievable goal. The weight loss that comes with a healthier lifestyle is a bonus.

As for eating right, that too can sound a little vague when it comes down to planning meals for the week. A good place to start is keeping track of what you normally eat for a week, then decide on a few things to change. For example, if eating a fast food lunch on the go is part of one’s weekly schedule decide to bring a sandwich from home two days a week. Set the goal of doing this for one month and see how it goes. It may turn out that it makes life simpler and provides more energy throughout the day.

Also, check out the Web for meal planning resources or go to the local library to check out healthy cookbooks. The University of Michigan has a great website related to its healthy eating initiative that demonstrates the components of a well-balanced meal at michigantoday.umich.edu/2008/mar/great-plate.php.

Another popular resolution is getting out of debt or saving money. Again, breaking this down a bit will help take it from a goal to a reality. A good place to start is setting January as the month for keeping all receipts and paying attention to where the money goes. At the end of the month really look at what money was spent for the month and why. Then set a budget for the next month, not the whole year. Do this each month, making a once a month goal to keep.

Moderation in spending can go a long way. Depriving one’s self doesn’t usually work out in the long run, but rather take baby steps to cut back on spending. Going to the library to check out personal finance books can help in developing an individual plan. Sarah Lindner of the Austin-American Stateman suggests the personal finance blog The Simple Dollar (thesimpledollar.com), which is running a series to help break down financial goals into manageable steps.

Whatever the resolution may be, from finances to losing weight to quitting a bad habit, seeking a moderate way to incorporate the goal into daily life is more likely to ensure success. So make a simple, month-by-month plan, tell a few friends and family for support and then see how small steps can lead to big changes this year.

Tips and Guides: Ki works, and lives, in Austin Texas. His website has thorough descriptions of Austin real estate. The site has a search of the Austin MLS and a map search for Austin commercial real estate.

We are into the New Year! And I received my first text message before 7:00am this morning! The sender tells me that she is unhappy with her current job and wants to resign. I am reminded that the beginning of a New Year is just a very common time for people to feel the New Year blues. Doctors have warned of depression or anxiety brought on by the New Year.

After endless excitement of excessive partying over the holidays, some are exhausted and experiencing hangover with merry drinking. And they are also aware that they are heading back to work in a day or two. Back to the daily routine; back to where they were. Nothing has changed since the holiday first started.

And the alcohol which they enjoyed, apart from adding to the blues and their weight has not made their challenges go away. It has probably added to the depression. They are now aware that they may have over spent, been over eating and over drinking during the holidays. The body is lethargic and overloaded with sugar and alcohol.

And some probably would have broken their New Year resolution by now and feels terrible about it - yes, we are talking about day one. Setting of New Year resolution and goals are not to be done lightly. If goals are not set properly, they can bring about more harm than good.

For those who are alone, festive period just highlighted the sense of aloneness and isolation. It is no wonder that the sense of emptiness and mild depression sets in. So what do we do?

Be kind to yourself and not allow the stress of hopelessness, helplessness, and isolation to overcome you. The question to ask is not “How did I end up here?” But rather “Where do I go from here?” And the appropriate response will be “The next step.” Deal with the issues one step at a time.

Be kind to your body. Let your body take the much needed rest to recuperate from the stress and strain. Give yourself lots of water to keep your body hydrated. Some warm herbal tea will also be helpful. Your body has the amazing ability to heal itself yet you need to give it the right environment to do its work.

Tell yourself it is alright to face reality and feel “lost” for a little while until you get your bearings again. If there are lingering stress, talk it over with someone; articulating the issues releases stress and helps you see it in a different light. Calm yourself down so you are able to have clarity of your mind. You will be able to see things in its perspectives to take the next step.

Set yourself up for success. You want to set realistic yet outstanding New Year goals. Set your expectations right. Although you may have the long term goal of not needing to work again, you want to shoot for the next step in your plan. That may be clearing all bad debts and building your case for the next $100,000 deal. Or simplifying your expenditures and planning to pay all bills on time may be another practical yet effective goal.

Get into action. Thinking about the goal will not bring about any change and will not get you out of the rut. Start with small steps and work from there. Setting up structures and getting an accountability partner will be helpful.

New Year need not stress you out. The New Year is full of hope and life. You can set outstanding yet achiveable goals for your health, career, relationship and business. You can tap into your inner potential for great success.

Tips and Guides: Louisa Chan is a Certified Professional Coach, your partner for success. Claim your free e-course and audio on stress-free living tips. You can also contact Coach Louisa for a complimentary strategy session to set your personal and professional goals. Louisa will help you set up structures and accountability that will bring you to the next level of success.